The Muscle of affirmative talking!
You are too weak. Your music sucks. You are ugly. You cant read. You are not good enough. You have failed. Stop shouting. You are too slow etc…..!
When i think about some of my insecurities and fears many of which originate from some remarks made about me years ago i sometimes stumble into doubt and vulnerability.
Consider your self lucky if such comments and remarks made by people around you don't bother you. But for me and a few friends that i know very well, such particular words cut to the core of our self esteem.
I am an example of a person that has experienced the truth of Proverbs 12:18: "Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” and i now that i have painfully come to learn that words hold a power as strong as a nuclear bomb i cant help but ask my self why do people use them so carelessly? Like a sharp spear our reckless words pierce our families, the people we love most and our reputations.
The #LyllTalk is not supposed to focus on the negative so i will let you answer that question your self. How ever with my own understanding and research i thought i should share about how you can learn to eliminate your cutting comments and use your words to motivate and show love rather than weaken and cripple. I want you to find a silver lining in the cloud not the blackness in it. Some people call this perspective. I don't know what you call it.
Its evident most people don't really intend for their words to hurt others, I just think some become too lazy especially with regard to their own family and loved ones to find the right words and expressions to positively match up to the situation at hand.
Lets take this as an example, you are a student and your results just came back after an examination. Your teacher holds your papers in his hands and angrily roars in front of the classroom ‘Lyrical Mycheal you have failed” You wouldn't enjoy that kind of music, would you? How about if he called you to his desk and smiled with your papers in his hands and softly let you know ‘Lyrical Mycheal you did your best i know but here is where you need to make improvements”
I once attended a meeting by Pastor Robert Kayanja and i remember him quoting something that literally set me straight like an electric pole. I wrote it in my note book - the object of love is not getting something you want, but doing something for the well being of the one you love - to zero that to what am writing about today i want you to know that when we receive affirming, positive, constructive, polite, soft, humble, promising, understanding words we are far more likely to be motivated to improve, open up for change, consider their advise and reciprocate.
As humans it seems natural to give in to our natural instinct to criticise but this only is a sure way to build unscalable walls in our family, work place and communities. By criticising we send the message that someone is unacceptable to us, has to prove themselves, or needs to change to earn our approval. Words that promise defeat and dead ends destroy the self worth of people and feed a sense of distrust and hurt.
The approach of affirmative talking on the other hand is free and simple yet so fruitful. You can try it any time. Begin by focussing and commenting on the positive. Those good little things people do daily. The way they combed their hair or even how they smell. Then you will slowly learn how to see the half full glass and not the half empty glass of water.
If a lady walks to you and begin by complementing how her smile makes her face beautiful. The magic words are not only limited to Please. Sorry and Thank you. Try using I miss you. I love your shirt. You look bright. You are incredible. You are the next big thing. You are adorable etc… Instead of shouting don't run, simply say please walk.
I always see girls faces light up and mens shoulders straighten with pride. Thats how i know my expression is being appreciated.
I will leave you with something a writer in the good book said that i know was sharing my sentiment when he did a couple of a thousand years ago. "Though the tongue is a small part - of the body - it boasts great things. And the tongue is a fire" God has entrusted you with much responsibility when it comes to the words you speak. It is my wish that you make sure you are using them to edify, encourage, and motivate others - and most importantly, to glorify your maker!
My name is Lyrical Mycheal and i hope you have already watched my brand new video called WRONG NUMBER. follow this link to watch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1WNdgLGId0
see you soon!